Handicapping the NHL Playoffs

Ok, yes it has been quite awhile since I've written last. Yes, the debacle back when the Bruins laid down to the Penguins at home in a pathetic loss may have lead me to say some bad things. Yes, those bad things included saying I quit. It was like breaking up with a girlfriend that treats you like trash over and over and you've finally had enough. There was a moment of liberation; however, they're like a drug and you need to come back for more. Well, they began holding up their end of the bargain a bit and managed to rip off an 8-3-1 stretch to end the season and log themselves a #6 seed in the playoffs. Impressive, yes. What makes this scenario even more impressive is the fact that they are by far the worst scoring team in the NHL, even worse than Edmonton who finished the season with -6 points (fact).

So, how in H-E-Double hockey sticks did the Bruins pull this off? Well, without the crutches of Patrice Bergeron (him clearing the puck out before an own goal on Saturday could have been the play of the year) and Tuukka Rask, this team would be nowhere. Team defense, ranked 2nd overall, has gotten them to where they are. Even with Dennis Seidenberg (a MUST re-sign on the offseason), Mark Stuart, and Andrew "Exploding Groin" Ference, they have managed to play Claude Julien's defensive scheme to a T.

With this said, drawing Buffalo in the first round probably gives them the best chance at winning a series. It will be a bitter Adams Division dog fight to the end as both teams do not exactly light up the scoreboard. Ryan Miller vs. Tuukka Rask probably represents your best goaltending matchup in the playoffs. These games will turn out to be 2-1 and 3-2 type affairs. What worries me is the Bruins being able to put three goals in. Furthermore, Tuukka is not playoff tested yet but he knows he needs to step it up in order to have a fighting chance.

Prediction: Let the homer have his time, B's in 7

Washington (1) vs. Montreal (8)
The Capitals offense is scary good. They're the first team to score 300+ goals in a season in quite awhile. Montreal may have some decent goaltending from Jarislav Halak, but he'll need a Superman performance. Ovechkin, Semin, Backstrom, Knuble, Laich, the list goes on and the Caps run away with this one in a sweep. FYI, Semin and Backstrom may be the most underrated players in the NHL. Ovechkin steals the spotlight from two guys who are top 3 forwards on ANY team.

New Jersey (2) vs. Philadelphia (7)
Philadelphia BARELY squeaked into the playoffs with a shootout victory over the Rangers on the last day of the regular season. Please, allow me to take a moment and laugh at NY for failing yet again. Ok thanks. Philly's goaltending has been a revolving door to say the least with the likes of Michael Leighton, Brian Boucher, Ray Emery, et al. all going down with injuries at some point. It will be up to Boucher to man the pipes; however, with Mr. Brodeur at the other end of the ice, Philly has no shot at this one. I'm interested to see how Ilya Kovalchuk takes advantage of being on the big stage with millions of dollars at stake in his next contract. A poor performance may cost him some cash.
Prediction: Devils in 5

Pittsburgh (4) vs. Ottawa (5)
The defending cup champs will experience a mere bump in the road on their quest for another cup. Ottawa has had a nice season, but Crosby, Malkin, & Co. are way too much for the Senators to handle. This one will be over with in a hurry.
Prediction: Penguins in 5

Western Conference

San Jose (1) vs. Colorado (8)
Uh oh, it's the playoffs San Jose! As George Costanza would say, "Let's get nuts!" Furthermore, it's that time of the year when old pal Joe Thornton checks out of competition and takes a back seat to watch how the game is played. The Sharks are perennial regular season paper champs that have ALWAYS blown it on the big stage (that's what she said?). Either way, a lineup of Thornton, Heatley, and Marleau should in essence lead this team far. They'll finally win a series against an Avalanche team that peaked too early. Former Bruin Craig Anderson has been a great story in net for Colorado, but no dice on this one. In the end, the Sharks power will be too much.
Prediction: Sharks in 6

Chicago (2) vs. Nashville (7)
The big question plaguing Chicago all season has been the stability of their goaltending. This is a question mark that no team wants going into the playoffs as it's what you have between the pipes that determines the fate of Lord Stanley. Chicago will win this series on skill alone, but don't count Nashville out of giving them some grief along the way.
Prediction: Chicago in 6

Vancouver (3) vs. Los Angeles (6)
Roberto Luongo, the best goalie in the NHL to never have sniffed the Cup. Is this the time to do so on the legs of Olympic gold? Vancouver will handle the Kings with ease as they are another team that peaked too early. Jonathan Quick is a fantastic up-and-coming goalie for LA, but the skill of the Canucks with MVP candidate Daniel Sedin will take care of business quickly.
Prediction: Vancouver in 5

Phoenix (4) vs. Detroit (5)
Phoenix fans must be wondering why after such a renaissance season that they had to draw perennial power house Detroit. If I were a Coyotes fan, and thank God I'm not, I'd be changing my shorts frequently with the thought of a finally healthy Red Wings team flying into Phoenix. It's almost comical that after all the trials and tribulations of a team on the potential move, bankruptcy, and quitting coaches, that something like this had to happen. Phoenix gets no love and will continue to taste the tears of defeat. Look on the bright side 'Yotes fans, you have the pleasure of doing your little "white out" for the first time in ages. Enjoy it while it lasts because you'll probably be watching your team play hockey in Canada again soon. Bring back the Jets!
Prediction: Red Wings in 5

So, there you have it. The chalk looks good in almost all the matchups except for my homeristic tendencies and with the scary good Red Wings. Should make for a quick 1st round for most teams. See you in the 2nd round folks.